The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows
by iflyairplanes1
Summary: Emma moved away for a year, then came back. She's changed, lost, confused, and hurt. Can someone save her? Eventually Jemma
1. Prologue

kayyy author's note! umm language.. well there's alot of cursing, because well, i can't give away the story now but Emma picked it up from somewhere. If you don't like it, ignore it, I just don't want flames saying that there should be less cursing. My fanfiction, my words. But I'll love you like the dickens if you review with good constructive critism. I'm not the most amazing writer but I think I have good ideas.

i love you all x333

k disclaimer : I DONT OWN DEGRASSI. I wish haha. But I do own Cal, Elizabeth, Daniel, and a few minor characters.

oh and boldness means it's a different language being spoken between characters.

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She stood in front of it, the school she had ditched for a year to live with her psychotic, abusive, whore-of-a-mother. _I can't believe I'm back.. I don't think I can do this_ Emma thought to herself as she walked through the front doors of Degrassi Community School.

Everyone was staring at her, wondering if it was really Emma Nelson, and if she was staying for good.

Emma got her books out of her locker, and started walking to class. Suddenly she saw someone. Well really, she saw _him_.

It was part of the agreement, he had to come watch her if she was going back to DCS. Elizabeth wasn't oblivious to the fact that he was a horrible person, but she worshipped anyone who would fuck up Emma's life.

_Flashback_

_"Emma why the fuck do you wanna go back there? Huh? Well if your going Cal's fucking going with you, you stupid bitch," Elizabeth said as she slapped Emma._

_End Flashback_

He was standing with Jay and his crew. Figures, Emma had told him all about Jay one of the nights he drugged and boozed her up to rape her. Sean was back, she noticed, but she was too busy trying to ignore Cal and Jay to talk to him.

At least she had MI first period, she'd get to see Snake for the first time in a year.

It was hard, for almost all of her life, to pretend Spike and Snake were her real parents. They were really her aunt and uncle, Spike is Elizabeth's sister.

She was late for MI, she hadn't been in the building for awhile so she got lost. When she walked in, she found 22 pairs of eyes all staring at her.

"Emma Nelson... welcome back," Snake greeted her with a smile.

Her peers were less than friendly.

"No calls, no emails, no nothing Emma. You expect us to come crawling back like nothing ever happened? Whatever." Liberty turned away and started talking to her boyfriend, still, J.T. Yorke.

"Gosh. I cannot believe the nerve of some people." She added for extra emphasis.

"Em, hey. Call me later, we need to hang out its been way too long," Manny said to Emma while writing her number on a piece of paper.

"Yeah, of course Manny. We can hang out tomorrow or something." Emma said as she started to work.

Finally it was the end of the day. Emma waited at the front for Cal to come out so he could drive her home. She was waiting for 20 minutes when she saw him hanging out with Jay and his crew by Jay's car. _Fuck_, she thought, _now isn't this just fucking great?_

Emma walked over to Cal.

"Um, Cal. You need to drive me home, remember?"

"Whatever. You can walk home," Cal replied, "**God knows you could use the exercise**".

Emma glared at him. He knew just which buttons to push to hurt her.

"**Just fucking drive me home, you dickface**," Emma finally said.

"You'll get in the car and wait for me. Get out and your fucking walking, slut." Cal said.

Emma walked into the car and waited for what felt like an hour. Finally, 30 minutes later Cal got in and drove her home.

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Yeah yeah, boring I know. But I swear there is mucho drama in the next chaper. And I'm pretty sure that eventually this will turn into a Jemma, but it might not be for a lot of chapters because I want to keep them in character and not rush it.

Review and I'll love youx33333


	2. Black Dresses

**Emma's POV**

Why the hell was Jay Hogart and all his friends standing on my doorstep? We all just stood there staring at eachother with these "What the fuck?" looks on our faces, until Alex spoke up.

"You live here? I thought this was where Cal lived." Alex glared at me.

"He's in the kitchen." I said as my cellphone started to ring, playing BYOB by System of a Down, meaning it was Elizabeth, my mother, calling.

"Hello Elizabeth," I said.

"Emma, I'm out with Patrick for the night. I have 15 clients scheduled you need to take over for me."

"No Elizabeth I'm not working for you."

"Well if you fucking wanna stay here then you'll fucking do it you fucking bitch," Elizabeth snapped into the phone before hanging up. She knew that would get to me and that I'd do it.

I needed something to drink, vodka would do the trick. Lots and lots of vodka to get over the fact that I had to fuck for the money to pay our bills tonight.

I went into the kitchen, forgetting that people were in there, and got the biggest bottle of Skyy vodka I could find.

Jay, Alex, Sean, Amy, Towerz, they all stared at me as I downed the bottle in 30 seconds flat.

"Haha, working for Elizabeth tonight, eh?" Cal laughed at me.

"Fuck you Cal," I said as I felt the liquor taking it's effect on me.

"Aww little Greenpeace needs to work for mommy tonight, what's she gotta do that she needs to be shitfaced for, eat meat?" Alex laughed at her own little joke.

"Elizabeth Cataleen y'all heard of her?" I asked.

"Yeah, she's only the hottest fucking whore ever," Towerz replied.

"She's my fucking mother," I exclaimed as I went to get the doorbell, my first client.

3 hours later, 15 clients later, and $50,000 richer, I was done. The alcohol had completely worn off, but Jay and Alex and Sean and Towerz were still at her house. They were all in Cal's room, which was next to my room, whoopee. I could hear them laughing and all talking about me. Cal was probably telling them all these lies and then they'd end up all over school the next day.

It was dinnertime, but I wasn't hungry. I listened to my iPod but decided to go get a bottle of water from the kitchen. Fuck. As I was walking down to the kitchen "Black Dresses" by the Spill Canvas came on. I couldn't listen to it, it brought back too many memories of when me and Cal were.. kind of together. I still had it on when I realized I was in the kitchen.

"What are you listening to?" Cal asked.

I plugged it into the stereo in the next room and put it on loud enough so everyone could hear it.

I was singing along, not even noticing.

"Just do as your instructed and... take this razor and cut your palms, I'll do the same until a river of crimson begins to flow," I was interrupted by Cal.

"Well that's not a new experience for you," He smirked, obviously talking about the line I had just sung.

"I never fucking slit my wrists." That was all I could say.

I went upstairs and cryed, because I knew it was a lie, as much as I wanted to forget it.

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yeah yeah I suck at writing.

And my cliffhangers suck.

PREVIEW OF CHAPTER THREE!

_"Are you here to get food? There's no point, you're just going to throw it up when you're done eating it."_

_Did Cal purposely try to make my life hell?_

_"It's called binging and purging for a reason. You have to binge first. Dumbass." Realizing what I just said, I ran downstairs._

Yes oh the drama, well lack of but it gets good

much love

x33


	3. A Blessing in Disguise

Mkayy I forgot to say earlier that Jay and Alex are broken up but their friends now. And Amy and Alex are friends.

Please review x33

**i don't own degrassi or it's characters. but it'd rock like the dickens if i did haha**

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Emma sat in front of the toilet... thinking about what she was about to do. It's not like she wasn't used to it, throwing up after she ate, but sometimes when she did it she wondered exactly what kept her going on with it. Of course, the obvious answer was Elizabeth. Elizabeth hadn't made her started, oh no Emma started all on her own, but when Elizabeth found out she sure as hell didn't make Emma quit. In fact, it was quite the opposite, if Emma didn't throw up after eating then Elizabeth would make her, by maybe forcing 3 bottles of vodka down Emma's throat, thus causing her to throw up and pass out.

Thinking about it did nothing. No doubts or anything. Some people binge and purge to lose weight, others do it because they have problems at home. Emma started it to lose weight, then she was forced to continue, hence the problems at home.

Jay heard the faint sounds of vomiting from his seat in the living room.

"Yo. Cal? What's that sound?" He asked.  
"Oh that? Thats just Emma throwing up," Cal replied as if it were nothing.

"Is she sick? Did one of those guys give her something?"

"No, she always throws up after she eats, if she actually eats for once," Cal smirked and continued his conversation and his flirting with Alex.

Midnight came, and Emma decided to go into the basement and watch TV.

Cal, Jay, Alex, Sean, Towerz, and Amy were all sitting in the kitchen, which coincidently Emma had to pass through to get to the stairs.

"Come here for a midnight snack, eh?" Cal smirked.

"Go to hell, Cal. I'm hungry." Emma replied back, looking expressionless.

"What's the point? You're only going to throw it up in like 20 minutes," Cal asked.

"Usually, in binging and purging, you have to binge first. Dumbass." Everyone stopped and looked at Emma. Realizing what she said she ran downstairs.

About thirty minutes later, there was a knock on the basement door, with Cal and everyone asking if they could come downstairs and hang out. Emma went and opened the door for them.

"Hey, y'all. I'm just watching Boy Meets World," She sat down and laughed at one of the jokes on the show.

Cal sat next to her.

"So, you throw up yet bulimia princess?" Cal was always teasing her, he knew that it got to her.

"Shut the fuck up, Cal," Emma retorted back.

"No. I want you to admit it, admit that your bulimic. That's the first step to helping you deal anyways."

"Ha. Like you even care if I deal or not. What-the-fuck-ever." Emma stood up.

"Fuck you, Cal. Okay you guys? I'm fucking bulimic. Is that what you want to hear? Perfect little miss greenpeace either doesn't eat or throws up after if she does! Woop-de-fucking-do." Emma ran upstairs with tears in her eyes.

Jay followed her up to her room.

"Why are you doing this to yourself? Do you think you're fat or something?" He yelled.

"You don't know me, Jay. You don't know or understand one thing about me. You think I'm fucking bulimic by choice? I may have started it by myself but if I had a say in it I'd have been finished with it years ago. No Jay. Elizabeth makes me do it. Are you fucking happy now?" She shouted back as she kneeled down and stuck her fingers down her throat as far as they could go.

Jay was speechless, but then did the only thing he could do to help: He held her hair back as she purged.


End file.
